What's In A Name

I got to thinking about names the other day and how they are used, especially when we are younger. I could always tell how little or how much trouble I was in by the way my mom said my name. I came up with four different levels.

Level 1: First name was shouted but no major anger was behind it.
Definition: Come here, you are needed.

Level 2: First name shouted with some anger behind it.
Definition: You are in trouble. Need to get to the room where your name was shouted before you get into more trouble.

Level 3: First and middle name has been shouted.
Definition: You are in some serious trouble. Expect some type of discipline.

Level 4: First, middle, and last name (full legal name) has been shouted.
Definition: You are dead meat. Time to write your will.

Would you add any other levels or definitions?

Culinary Aventures with Kit Kats

So my good friend Marie loves to send me interesting things and this newest gift that arrived in the mail is no exception. She sent me a movie and a bag of mini Kit Kat bars; 16 of them to be exact. They aren't your ordinary Kit Kats; they are flavors that appear in Japan.

Unknown Kit Kat #1

Upon opening, the Kit Kat was a green tea color with no real strong smell. Ironically enough, green tea was the flavor. It wasn't bad, just a strong flavor, similar to a stongly brewed macha green tea. Lee declined to try this one.

Unknown Kit Kat #2

This one had a sandwich picture on it. It smelled chocolaty with a touch of peanut butter. Didn't taste too different than a traditional Kit Kat. Lee tried this one and agreed that it was pretty good.

Unknown Kit Kat #3

The package had no pictures, just writing. This one was a dark green in color and smelled like green tea. It also tasted like strong green tea, very much like unknown Kit Kat #1. Lee again declined to taste it.

Unknown Kit Kat #4

The package just had a picture of an apple on it. It was the traditional Kit Kat chocolate brown and did have the strong smell of an apple. It tasted as if you took the green apple Jolly Rancher flavor and infused it into the chocolate. It wasn't bad, just unusual. Lee didn't want to try this one either since he isn't a big fan of apples.

Unknown Kit Kat #5

I was a little worried to try this one since I was worried it would be really spicy but it didn't smell like it. It was covered in white chocolate and smelled a bit like hazelnut. It tasted like it too. Even though it didn't taste bad, I don't think that I'd want to eat a big one since hazelnut reminds me too much of coffee (since it is paired so much with it). I was the only one who ate it.

Unknown Kit Kat #6

This one had a leaf shaped cookie that looked to have a chocolate filling. It was covered with a chocolate that looked beige in color and had a nutty smell. It tasted a bit nutty as well but I couldn't place the taste. Either way, it was pretty good.

Unknown Kit Kat #7

This package was solid black and smelled like dark chocolate. It tasted like dark chocolate as well but not the normal kind. It tasted like it was one of the higher percentages. Either way, both Lee and I enjoyed this one.

Unknown Kit Kat #8

A lavender colored Kit Kat awaited me under this purple wrapper with its purple frosted cookie. It really didn't have a smell but when I bit into it, it had a flavor of white chocolate mixed with a touch of blueberry. It was tasty but since I said it had a blueberry flavor, Lee declined to try it.

Unknown Kit Kat #9

Can we say how bold the letters are on this red package? I'm not sure that I could have figured out that it was a Kit Kat (read that last sentence with as much sarcasm as you can). Anyways, this one was an original Kit Kat.

Unknown Kit Kat #10

The picture that was on this package looked to be a slice of cheesecake with a strawberry drizzle on it. The flavor was a bit like a cheesecake chocolate so it wasn't too bad. Cheesecake is a hard flavor to replicate well in chocolate. Lee didn't want to try it.

Unknown Kit Kat #11

Thanks to a coworker of mine, she informed me that the writing on this particular Kit Kat was wasabi. Never having wasabi before but knowing of it's heat, ot made me a bit nervous to try it. It was a pale green in color with no particular smell. When I ate it, there was no spiciness, just a bit of gritty white chocolate. Lee declined to try it.

Unknown Kit Kat #12

So no pictures on this one but when I opened it, it smelled a lot like watermelon. The chocolate was also a pale pink. I do have to admit that it tasted like watermelon as well. It was a very unusual taste. Lee didn't want to try it.

Unknown Kit Kat #13

So this one sported a picture of a wine filled glass paired with raisins. The candy was covered in white chocolate & smelled of raisins. It definitely tasted of raisins too. Not one I would care to eat again. I like raisins, just not raisin flavored chocolate.

Unknown Kit Kat #14

Can we say green tea number 3? Same flavor as unknown Kit Kats 1 and 3. Rather strong. Don't think the green tea ones are my cup of tea. (Get it? Ha!)

Unknown Kit Kat #15

This one, based on the picture, I figured would taste like black tea. Opening the package up & seeing the color of the chocolate made me not sure I wanted to taste it. It was baby poop green. It smelled like tea and tastes like licking black tea leaves. Such a strong flavor. Lee laughed at the face I made while trying a bite.

Unknown Kit Kat #16

The last one of the bag. It was pink in color and smelled like strawberry. It tasted pretty good. Sort of reminded me of those pink wafer cookies I had when I was a kid that came in a pack with chocolate & vanilla. Since Lee is not a strawberry fan, so I didn't offer to share.

So this is the end of my Kit Kat adventure. It was a definite ride for my tastebuds. Don't think I want to eat all of these again but it was fun to try new things.

And Then, Kindness Came Unexpectedly

When you are an individual that doesn't get noticed much or gets swept under the rug or is the odd man out, it is a rare jewel to receive news that a person fought back for you.

To set the scene, last week I had a major allergy attack. Not just the sinus congestion and runny nose, but raw throat with muscle & joint aches that make you feel like you have been run over by a mac truck. I did what I always do, took some meds and went to work. Not the best thing I could have done since it felt like my brain was floating in a vat of stupid. I did my best that day but towards the end, I was dragging. I was doing everything I could to keep moving because I knew if I stopped, it was very unlikely that I would be able to get going again. Apparently, what I was doing wasn't enough because I got my ass chewed by one of my managers. After that, I felt rather broken.

I learned earlier today that a dear associate friend of mine that I love to work with, Ann, told me what she told the same manager how much the store needed me and how I didn't deserve what I had received that night. When she told me that, it almost made me cry. It was something that I needed to hear & was so wonderful to have someone come to my defense.  Ann has been a wonderful person to work with and we have become good friends.

That one, simple act of kindness made the world in which I dwell a little less darker. So to you my dear Ann, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for coming to my defense. Your kindness & friendship will always be cherished my dear friend. You always have my love.

Lead Me Into New Worlds

When I was a kid, I loved to read just about anything I could get my hands on. I still am an avid reader. Since I didn't have a job as a kid and my birthday was only once a year, I couldn't get all the books I wanted, I had to get books another way. Luckily, my mom had moved into a house not far from a local public library.

That wonderful building was my entrance to countless worlds. My favorite part was wandering up and down the aisles, gazing over the multitude of book spines, pulling down every book that called out to me. I got to slay vampires, create mummies, swim with fishes, and visit new planets. Non fiction and fiction books were equal in my eyes.

My mom knew that if I wasn't at the house, I was at the library. If I could have slept there, I probably would have. To this day, I can't even drive past a library without wanting to go in and wander the aisles.

Don't Stare Into the Beam

Due to some issues with my knee, I got to experience my first MRI yesterday. It wasn't bad. The nurses were nice and the scrubs they gave me to wear weren't itchy & actually quite comfortable. The weird part is how time passes during the procedure.

Obviously you can not wear any metal whatsoever, so keeping your watch or fitbit on is out of the question. You are told to lie as still as possible, so turning your head to look for a clock is out of the question. They do give you music to listen to, or at least the place I went to did. I was given my choice of music, so I selected rock.

I put the headphones on as they put me into the machine. The person before me was listening to country, so I listened to about half of a song before the music style changed. During the course of the procedure, I listened to six and a half rock songs. If you figure that the average song is about 3 to 3.5 minutes long, you can get a decent gauge on how long you have been in the machine. If we go off that math, I was in the machine for about 7 songs (0.5 country + 6.5 rock). Three to 3.5 minutes per song puts me at 21 to 24.5 minutes. Lee would have been so proud of me mathing during my procedure.  Music does make the procedure go by faster, so it makes me wonder if they were able to provide music to those people who needed to have an MRI when the device first came into use.


(Side note: the title of this blog entry came from a note on the MRI machine that was almost right above my head. Not sure what beam they were talking about & I forgot to ask when the procedure was over.)

A Small Business Dies

I found out earlier this week that a wonderful, family owned restaurant that my husband and I have loved from day one, has had to close it's doors. The people who ran it were not cruel & did not serve sub-par food. The place was clean, food was very tasty & didn't break your bank.

While they were new, they had the potential to be great. Sadly, due to a review in the local paper, it seemed like business started to decline. Don't get me wrong, reading reviews can be a good way to gauge a business but the person who wrote this particular one seemed to pick at every tiny flaw he saw, whether they were real or imaginary. And he wasn't even a true food critic. Just a writer doing a job and a poor one at that. Going into any new place, one must not hold it to how other places do things. Each place is different & their good qualities must be viewed that way. This writer did not do that.

So I must bid a fond farewell to a place my husband and I loved so much. Michelle & Jim, thank you for sharing your dream with us. You are wonderful people and I hope that the future holds only good things for you. You will be sadly missed.

The Reminder

There is a mark on my right hand, a pink mark about an inch long. It is a scar, caused by self harm.

This particular mark was created due to an conversion between myself and my boss. The negative feedback that I received was overwhelming to my brain. When this happens, a pit of despair opens up & threatens to swallow me whole. The pain in my chest can get to the point where I feel I have to cause pain elsewhere on my body to allow the release of the pain in my heart. I don't use any tool, just my fingernails. I will scratch my skin hard, over and over again until I feel the pain in my heart subside. In most cases, the scratches are in areas covered by my clothes and done when no one is around. Sadly, the mark on my hand was caused during the conversation with my boss, running a fingernail back and forth, like a saw against my skin.

Why do I share this? What good can come from it? They say that the first step to healing is to admit you have a problem. I have been self harming for years, since my teens. I have spoken of it to very few people but my husband knows the true depths of it. He has helped me and I don't do it as much as I used to. But I still do it and the scar is a reminder of what happens when that depression take a hold. The scar also reminds me that I can heal as well.

Flamingos Don't Equal Sex Freud

I have never been one for trying to interpret my dreams since they can get pretty weird, but I had one the other night that had me curious about some of the symbols.  

To start off, I was dreaming that I was in a M.A.S.H. episode.  Hawkeye kept running off during the whole episode, trying to find a pet to keep in the Swamp because he was lonely.  I was one of the many people that kept trying to find him every time he ran off.  He finally arrived, via a helicopter, hugging a rather grumpy flamingo.  Not a stuffed flamingo, but a live, pink flamingo.  The dream ends with the flamingo struggling out of Hawkeye's arms and flying away.

Now, when it comes to dream interpretation, you need to pick out the images that stand out the most.  I would say the images that stood out to me was pink, flamingo, searching, and Hawkeye, so lets start with what those images mean.

Flamingo: To see a flamingo in your dream represents you sense of community and cooperation. It also indicates new experiences or situations. Alternatively, you may be overly concerned with your physical appearance.

Pink:  Pink is a combination of red and white. It is an innocent version of red. Pink represents love, sweetness, happiness, kindness, romance, compassion, softness, and affection. It is associated with femininity and could also be associated with being in young love or the healing powers of love and friendship.

Hot pink or magenta may represent feelings of lust and have a sensual undertone, like the color red.

Pink may also have negative connotations, especially if the dreamer dislikes pink. It can be a color of immaturity and weakness. Dreaming of pink consistently may represent issues of dependency or unresolved issues with parents. Finally, some may associate pink with getting a pink slip or getting fired from a job.

Pink is associated with the heart chakra or the fourth chakra. Some may associate pink with universal love and caring for others.

Searching:  To dream that you are searching for something signifies the need to find something that is missing or needed in your life. The dream may be analogous to your search for love, spiritual enlightenment, peace or even a solution to a problem.

Hawkeye:  For this one, I went with the meaning for actor

To see an actor or actress in your dream represents your pursuit for pleasure. Your admiration of a particular celebrity may lead to a desire to have some of their physical or personality traits. Consider also who this actor/actress is and what characteristics you associate with her or him. These may be the same characteristics that you need to acknowledge or incorporate into yourself. The dream may also be a pun on her or his name. 

To dream that you are an actor denotes that your hard work and labor will be well worth it in the end. It also indicates your strong desires to be recognized and acknowledged. Perhaps you are putting too much emphasis on your outward appearances. Alternatively, the dream may be analogous to the role that you are playing in your real life, whether it be the role of a parent, sibling, co-worker, etc.  Or perhaps you are putting on an act or a facade.

More specifically, if you dream that you are a supporting actor or supporting actress implies that you need to be supportive to those around you. It may seem that your presence doesn't matter, but you play an important part to someone's life. To dream that you are an extra in a movie means that you feel unimportant and unnoticed. Sometimes you feel you are blending in with the background. 

To see a particular actor or actress in your dream look at the role they are playing. Even though you may not know them on a personal level, how you perceive them or the characters they play can provide understanding in how it relates to you. 

To put it all together, I would have to say that this dream may simply be telling me that I am on the right path & doing what I am need to do to keep moving forward in life.  But since dream interpretation is not an exact science and can be interpreted differently by different people, you might have another insight.  What do you think it meant?

(Dream meanings came from this site:http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/f2.htm  and  https://exemplore.com/dreams/Dreaming-of-Colors-A-Dream-Dictionary-of-Colors)